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Tuesday, 07 October 2008

HOMECOMINg?!?!?!
fun? or DRAMAlisious?
this guy spent 40 bucks on me. kinda didnt dance with him the intirer dance and then fucking cheerleadings are FUCKING talking bout me. staying that he spent money on me i should of stayed with him. I WASnt HAVING FUCKING FUnnn
why should i FREAKING STAY WITH him. i thought i liked him.
and i said yes to HOMecoming cuz it was like 3 weeks ago couldnt back out then. MAde the best out of it. then i wasnt have fun. so i left and told him i wasnt finding my friends. i didnt like DITCH him i told him before i just wanted to be friends so he should no that. and hes not even cute. idont why i even wanted to go with him in the first place. and hes a senior im a sophomore. so we went to take pics with his friends and also 2 sophmores were there too. CHLOE AND LAUREN. so im not friends with thoses cheerleadings AWKARD as hell. to say the least. so i am taller then him. Hes so freaking weried he doesnt talk to me. And he told people that i was his girlfriend and that he was gonna hook up with him after wards. EWW EWW EWW ive only kissed him 3 times and he was my first kiss. aw NO. bad exprience haha. well its over. and i can move on. Im sorry if he payed money and thought he was gonna get something. but idk i guess ill get over the people talking about me. i guess it was kinda mean that i was dancing with other guys. but he was dancing with other girls. I wish i went with friends instead. i think i would only go with a guy if im going out with him next time, cuz it made things stupid ugh. leave it at that. Tell me what ya think?
FOREVER is enough?

blind FAITH?! is it possible.
okay so i neverr go on this ne more but i felt like i needed to write something now and keep it there so i can make a competement to do it. I made a braclet this summer saying FOREVER. i cant find it oh well. but it was a symbal to me. that i would forever stay in touch with God. and pray and be fully commited like i am at timberlee well im not and i feel that i tell people i am more then i truly am. I feel like since im a christian i can just be with God welll thats NOT true. im not in touch with him. so i have to believe and have more faith.
Its just that simple. haha

Wednesday, 26 March 2008

when will it be my turn.

the teen star looks in the mirror and sees everything she every wanted
but shes missing something, but can't put her finger on it. she has money, fame, fouture but
can you have it all but still be happy?

what does it feel like to be in the spot light? Do you feel on top of the world?
does everyone have a chance to be there?
my life
Right now its spring break. and i should be happy no school jus relax and think about nothing but you do get bored and i am. i thought i had some friends to just hang out but it seems like i dont have anyone right now, im lonely and disapointed. one of my friends went to England and then my other new friend is grounded and others are jus school friends its hard to jus sit on the computer the whole day or watch tv. im bored and i need sommething to do, i feel pointless. and serious sometimes school is better than nothing, i can't believe i actually said that. theres this guy lets call him steve and i have feelings for him and there rea lly true i think bout him i alot and we danced at the school dance and stuff but he says he likes me and this other girl, and he says all this stuff on aim and i believe him but the next day he doesn't talk to me at school and it hurts what should i think that hes jus shy or that he truly like the other girl more then me. he knows that im not as experienced as he is and he says that doesn't matter but wouldn't it hes a guy. idk what to think i wanna ask him but hes never online anymore and i cant call him it would be weried. this week he told me he wanted to hang out go to the movies or something and i was like yah! but i left a comment on his myspace saying that we should talk bout what to do and he never responded and hes been on. idk idk idk maybe i should try to get over him i tell myself but then is there a possible chance that he'll like me and i just blew that away, idk even y im worring bout this but i really truly have fallen for steve and its hurting me and idk what to do anymore.

be in the fast lane in life because the slow lane will never get you anywhere.
life is always moving, will never stop or change unless you do something
so if your unhappy about something figure it out.
what ever it is it can change. you are the driver in the car, and you make the
decisons on which way to turn, the safe route or the unsafe route.
your choice.

he looked into her eyes for the first time nothing in the world
matter at that second. they seemed like the only two in the world.

your the one i want to be with when i see the sunset. holding my hand

pictures found on photobucket, and many different sites not mine
when will it be my turn.
so i took some time to reread that post and i think im crazy for saying that shit
im fine the way i am i just have to wait and realize that im not perfect
jus have to vent some times and that it.
love becky

heres some beautiful pictures, take one and comment